The Daily Dump

A place where everyone (me) is welcomed to express their opinions openly and honestly. I encourage free thinking, free wheeling, off-the-cuff banter and monetary donations.

Friday, May 6

The Virgin Grimace

Have you seen this story about the water stain that looks like the Virgin Mary? I know this is old news, but I thought if I ignored it, it would go away. But now it seems that someone has defaced the image (painting “The Holy Ghost wuz here!” – just kidding, they painted a more banal “Big Lie”) prompting authorities to paint over the graffitied image in a pleasant poop brown color.

(Speaking of poop – what are the chances I could get a group of believers to flock to a log of my poop if it resembled a swaddling baby Jesus? Because don’t think it hasn’t happened at least twice before. Moreover, is there any word more underused in the English language than “swaddle”? By precise definition, when every baby is born, it is immediately swaddled. There are a lot of babies born everyday, yet I never hear the word. I also don’t hang out at hospitals in the maternity ward, but still. You would think I would come across it from time to time.)

Can someone please show me where the likeness is? Personally, I think the stain looks more like Grimace, McDonald’s version of the purple, furry milkshake, than it does the Virgin Mary.

And what’s more, Grimace is, in a lot of ways, a Christ-figure. According to McDonald’s, this is the history of Grimace:

And what’s more, Grimace is, in a lot of ways, a Christ-figure. According to McDonald’s, this is the history of Grimace:

“When Grimace first emerged from his cave and confronted the other citizens of McDonaldland, he expected them to be frightened of him. He had four arms and was known as the evil Grimace who stole everybody's milk shakes. The opposite turned out to be the case. No other character in McDonaldland is more beloved, especially by the children who visit McDonaldland from time to time. While initially conceived as a character representing McDonald's shakes, Grimace has transcended his role and is now seen as Ronald's closest friend. He still, though, retains his love of shakes.

Grimace personifies the child in everyone. He's a big, fuzzy, purple fellow, and is Ronald's right-hand man.

Everyone in McDonaldland loves Grimace because of his innocent, loving nature. He's enthusiastic, eager and easily pleased. Grimace walks with a rolling gait, and can't be classified as any particular kind of animal.

Grimace is generous and affectionate. He occasionally causes minor problems in McDonaldland because of his clumsiness and perpetual confusion. But, these problems are generously overlooked by his many friends.”

Except for the milk shakes and the part about being fuzzy and purple, you could easily take that as a description for Jesus (right hand man to God, not Ronald, of course.)

So, in this light, doesn’t Grimace sound like someone we should spend a little time worshiping? Or more to the point, wouldn’t the Virgin Mary be a little more interesting if there were more Biblical stories about her playfully stealing some of Jesus’ holy water while the apostles stood by and shaking their heads saying, “There goes Mary, making off with the holy water again. Good thing Jesus is easygoing.”

Maybe if she were, no one would have defaced her likeness in the first place.

Except for the milk shakes and the part about being fuzzy and purple, you could easily take that as a description for Jesus (right hand man to God, not Ronald, of course.)

So, in this light, doesn’t Grimace sound like someone we should spend a little time worshiping? Or more to the point, wouldn’t the Virgin Mary be a little more interesting if there were more Biblical stories about her playfully stealing some of Jesus’ holy water while the apostles stood by and shaking their heads saying, “There goes Mary, making off with the holy water again. Good thing Jesus is easygoing.”

Maybe if she were, no one would have defaced her likeness in the first place.

2 Comments:

If Ronald is God and Grimace is Jesus, does that make the Hamburglar Judas? Should we explore this further?

By Blogger Libby Mae Brown, at 9:23 AM  

Grimace is a tastebud. I learned this in Hamburgerology. Yes, McDonald's University. You drink your milkshake and it is soooooo cold ..... creating GRIMACE. I know it is sad I know this. I may have accidently posted this twice. Opps.

By Blogger little miss sunshine, at 12:17 PM  

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