The Daily Dump

A place where everyone (me) is welcomed to express their opinions openly and honestly. I encourage free thinking, free wheeling, off-the-cuff banter and monetary donations.

Tuesday, December 6

Hawaii Stories You’ll Hate To Love: Intro

It’s a well known fact that no one likes to hear uninteresting stories about other people’s vacations. It’s basically like starting off every sentence with, “Hey, remember the time that you weren’t there and . . .”

Then again, the whole point of blogging seems to be that everyone is a voyeur. We all love glimpses into other people’s sex lives. So while I don’t plan on boring you with things like, “And then we went to the beach and holy crap it was hot!” I would be remiss to not at least tell you about how our condo turned into a gay burlesque or about the cab driver who produced a Johnny Cash record or about the other cab driver who almost crashed into the Welcome sign at the Four Seasons or about the date rapist who tried to sell us his girlfriends. Basically every time I came off looking like an ass or almost dying or doing one of those things that makes my mother tear up and say, “What could I have done different?” – those are the things I’ll include.

Also, somehow, some way, NONE of us brought a digital camera with him. Broken, lost, not cool enough to have one – for whatever reason we got to Hawaii and then realized that we were going to have to make memories the old fashioned way: by writing haikus and using disposable cameras. Hence, I won’t have any pictures of the vacation for at least another few days. So, thanks to Flickr, I’ll be including pictures from other people’s Hawaiian vacations to give you an idea of what it’s like. For example:

This is not me getting married in Maui.

Neither is this.

(This could be fun . . .)

First story coming soon. Hold your breath.


At least your cabbie only produced a Johnny Cash record. While in Rome, one cabbie produced his tongue, ON MY FRIEND'S FACE. Looks like you got off easy. Can't wait to hear about the burlesque show, though.

By Blogger Trix, at 2:06 PM  

Thank you, Flickr.

By Blogger Kelly, at 3:27 PM  

*holding breath*

By Blogger missy, at 3:38 PM  

Tear up??? I'll probably throw up!

By Blogger belligerent mother, at 4:18 PM  

I love you too, Mom. I love you too . . .

By Blogger the belligerent intellectual, at 4:21 PM  

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